Just another case to file, another bad guy put away, another deal made. That thought, those words were swimming in her head like a plague.She felt bile rise in her throat at the thought of the deal she had negotiated with Elliott at the PA's urging, wishing, instead, that she could pull her weapon and put an end to his miserable excuse of a life. It would be like ridding the world of a stray rabid dog. He would never be rehabilitated, he would never feel shame or sorrow for what he had done. And after wading ankle deep in the blood of his murders, she couldn't help but think he'd be better off dead.But, that wasn't for her to decide, courts, judges and juries decided guilt and innocence, she just got the criminals off the streets. So she'd sat in that room and she'd managed through sheer will to stay professional. She had hid her intense feelings of disgust for the deadly killer by holding onto what she held dear by the skin of her teeth. She had done the job for the badge and what. We were both way too young to have been married. It seems we are almost roommates now, not lovers. Sometimes he is just so controlling, emotionally unavailable, a slob.That bastard is cheating, too – well I do not have any proof, but I damn well suspect that he is. I have seen how that little slutty receptionist looks at him. How he is always "bumping" into the divorcee across the street.I can come up with ten thousand different ways that what I am doing is a lot less worse than what he is doing.But why do I feel this is just a rationalization to excuse my actions? Am I just trying to convince myself?Week 8I really miss my friends. In the beginning, the totally exclusive, utterly secretive nature of my affair was one of its biggest appeals. It's was the two of us against the world and I did relish that bond. But I want to talk to someone, and now I have nowhere to turn. I know that even telling my best friend will put her in a bad position, and could possibly put the affair at risk..
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